Lost and barren, lonely and confused.
Between life and death, how do I choose?
Is living really good or is it just a curse?
Oh god I'm lost why can't I see
All this beauty around
Seems make believe
Blinded by tears
Yet immobilized by fear
I hear the sweet music ringing in my ear
But stop. Is it?
Is it the sound of the sweet notes of the song I long to hear
Or is it a trick that floats in my desperate ear?
How do I know? What should I do?
Oh god I'm lost why can't I see
All this beauty you bring
Seems make believe
Hearing only my own sobs is more than I can take!
Can you hear me cry out?
Do you see my mistake
Tell me plea
I sat in my room,
As a tear rolled gently down my cheek.
They always said,
That to have loved and lost,
Is better than never to have loved at all.
But after I've been through it,
I'm not so sure.
I look at the picture of him and I,
And think of what could have been.
I used to dream of him,
Looking deep into my blue eyes,
His hand caressing my face,
As he gently brushed a stray strand of hair,
Behind my ear,
Before he tenderly kissed me.
His soft lips brushing mine,
Only to wake up and realize it for what it was…
A Dream.
His deep brown eyes could pierce my soul,
And often I found myself praying he would glance my way.
To N
Each movement,
Precedes another.
Each force, be it dark or light,
Refuses to surrender.
The resounding clang,
Of two enemies clash.
The fate of one world,
Rests on two shoulders.
Each parry, each blade; a beat.
To which they both are driven.
Both for love long lost,
Neither for pain sprung anew.
Mercy is just a word,
Whispered as the wind goes by.
Locked in an eternal battle,
In which neither will yield.
Two foes, one song, one dance…
~Dance of Blades~
When I look into your eyes,
I see a love that knows no lies.
Deep into your soul I look,
To fin my heart you so gingerly took.
Where rainbows last forever and butterflies,
That's where I'll be waiting, under soft blue skies.
Daylight knows no boundaries, night holds no fear,
Life has no consequences, when you are near.
I don't believe I can describe the feelings I hold,
It's like the kind the story books told.
So please believe these feelings are true,
When I whisper;
"I love you…"
Prologue
McUrn Home: 1994
"Dad, Aphasia and I are going upstairs!" 18 year old Kree McUrn yelled to his father. As he ascended the stairs, a raven-haired, cocoa eyed Aphasia Shinwa followed humbly but happily behind him.
"We're going to work on a history project Mr. McUrn." the 16 year old Aphasia announced quietly but loud enough to be heard, to her best friends father.
"No molly-coddling, ya here!" Mr. McUrn bellowed back at his son in warning. Aphasia blushed while Kree just rolled his eyes at his fathers antics.
"Mind your own business old man!" Kree declared rudely, earning an elbow in the gut from his female friend.
"Don't wo
Sadness and depression claim me,
Making me their own.
I feel hatred welling up inside,
Why I do not know.
Darkness surrounds me,
Engulfing my whole.
Evil figures patronize,
Gnawing at my soul.
The darkness is so blinding,
Evil feels so good.
I can't see around me,
I don't know if I should.
My eyes are ever closed,
For fear of what they see.
The illusions I once knew,
Have been revealed for what they be.
This is why my eyes are shut,
I saw the beauty and believed.
I love, hated, cried and lost,
All because of what was perceived.
The beauty became ugly,
The splendor I once knew,
Came crashing in around me,
All because of
Sadness and depression claim me,
Making me their own.
I feel hatred welling up inside,
Why I do not know.
Darkness surrounds me,
Engulfing my whole.
Evil figures patronize,
Gnawing at my soul.
The darkness is so blinding,
Evil feels so good.
I can't see around me,
I don't know if I should.
My eyes are ever closed,
For fear of what they see.
The illusions I once knew,
Have been revealed for what they be.
This is why my eyes are shut,
I saw the beauty and believed.
I love, hated, cried and lost,
All because of what was perceived.
The beauty became ugly,
The splendor I once knew,
Came crashing in around me,
All because of
Prologue
McUrn Home: 1994
"Dad, Aphasia and I are going upstairs!" 18 year old Kree McUrn yelled to his father. As he ascended the stairs, a raven-haired, cocoa eyed Aphasia Shinwa followed humbly but happily behind him.
"We're going to work on a history project Mr. McUrn." the 16 year old Aphasia announced quietly but loud enough to be heard, to her best friends father.
"No molly-coddling, ya here!" Mr. McUrn bellowed back at his son in warning. Aphasia blushed while Kree just rolled his eyes at his fathers antics.
"Mind your own business old man!" Kree declared rudely, earning an elbow in the gut from his female friend.
"Don't wo
When I look into your eyes,
I see a love that knows no lies.
Deep into your soul I look,
To fin my heart you so gingerly took.
Where rainbows last forever and butterflies,
That's where I'll be waiting, under soft blue skies.
Daylight knows no boundaries, night holds no fear,
Life has no consequences, when you are near.
I don't believe I can describe the feelings I hold,
It's like the kind the story books told.
So please believe these feelings are true,
When I whisper;
"I love you…"
Each movement,
Precedes another.
Each force, be it dark or light,
Refuses to surrender.
The resounding clang,
Of two enemies clash.
The fate of one world,
Rests on two shoulders.
Each parry, each blade; a beat.
To which they both are driven.
Both for love long lost,
Neither for pain sprung anew.
Mercy is just a word,
Whispered as the wind goes by.
Locked in an eternal battle,
In which neither will yield.
Two foes, one song, one dance…
~Dance of Blades~
I sat in my room,
As a tear rolled gently down my cheek.
They always said,
That to have loved and lost,
Is better than never to have loved at all.
But after I've been through it,
I'm not so sure.
I look at the picture of him and I,
And think of what could have been.
I used to dream of him,
Looking deep into my blue eyes,
His hand caressing my face,
As he gently brushed a stray strand of hair,
Behind my ear,
Before he tenderly kissed me.
His soft lips brushing mine,
Only to wake up and realize it for what it was…
A Dream.
His deep brown eyes could pierce my soul,
And often I found myself praying he would glance my way.
To N
Prologue
McUrn Home: 1994
"Dad, Aphasia and I are going upstairs!" 18 year old Kree McUrn yelled to his father. As he ascended the stairs, a raven-haired, cocoa eyed Aphasia Shinwa followed humbly but happily behind him.
"We're going to work on a history project Mr. McUrn." the 16 year old Aphasia announced quietly but loud enough to be heard, to her best friends father.
"No molly-coddling, ya here!" Mr. McUrn bellowed back at his son in warning. Aphasia blushed while Kree just rolled his eyes at his fathers antics.
"Mind your own business old man!" Kree declared rudely, earning an elbow in the gut from his female friend.
"Don't wo
Current Residence: The place inside my head Favourite genre of music: ... MP3 player of choice: Creative Zen Micro Personal Quote: "The dance is a poem of which each movement is a word."
In my last entry I told you about my cousin, and how I don't appreciate his presence here, no matter how much I love him. Well today I think I proved myself wrong. My father has a tendancy to ridicule me in front of company and friends. I'm used to it by now, and having tried witty retorts, I just give up now and try to go introvert. Well today was one of those days. My entire family picks on me sometimes, and again, don't get me wrong, they are great parents/brothers, but they really need to find a better mode of motivation. My dad says he knows my buttons, and that I don't even make it hard anymore. When in all honesty, all he knows is how
Today my cousin from North Carolina came to visit. He is nineteen and a really nice guy. But I can't help but be angry, even though I know I have no right to be. He had come over last year to be taught by my dad, and during those few months I barely ever saw my dad, or spent quality time with him, and I always felt stupid. Now I worry that it might happen again, and I don't want it to. Is this wrong? I honestly can't tell anymore. Our country is so careful to say what is politically correct that I can't tell fact from fiction anymore. I don't enjoy living like this, but it could always be worse, and I thank... whoevers up there, for blessing
Ooo you hunted me down! Congrats. lol. I have been around but I have also been overwhelmed with projects at lunch hours. Our little 'icnic' yesterday was cool though me and Emliy agree we should make a potluck picnic with blanket and all. What do you think?
As for anime, its awesome. I wish I had more time to draw seeing as I'll probably lose my ability soon enough lol. Whos ur fav character?